Size Chart, White.jpg
Size Chart, White.jpg

Schmucks gonna schmuck. When in Rome...

$29.99

“Schmucks Gonna Schmuck” Tee

Designed for those who’ve stopped asking “Why?” and started muttering “Of course,” this unisex heavy cotton tee offers the deadpan comfort you’ll need to endure humanity’s ongoing parade of disappointment. The classic fit ensures it hangs just loosely enough to say, “I gave up, but I still got dressed.” Perfect for birthdays you didn’t want to attend, holidays you resent, and reunions that remind you why you left in the first place. Also makes a great gift for the one person in your life who still believes people can change. Ha.

Product Features

  • The Gildan 5000 is made with medium fabric (5.3 oz/yd² / 180 g/m²) consisting of 100% cotton, offering year-round comfort with lasting durability.  
  • The classic fit of this shirt ensures a comfy, relaxed wear while the crew neckline adds that neat, timeless look that can blend into any occasion, casual or semi-formal.  
  • The tear-away label means a scratch-free experience with no irritation or discomfort whatsoever.  
  • Made using 100% US cotton that is ethically grown and harvested.
  • Gildan is also a proud member of the US Cotton Trust Protocol ensuring ethical and sustainable means of production.  
  • This blank tee is certified by OEKO-TEX® STANDARD 100 (Certificate No. 168252, OETI - Institut fuer Oekologie).


EU representative: HONSON VENTURES LIMITED, gpsr@honsonventures.com, 3, Gnaftis House flat 102, Limassol, Mesa Geitonia, 4003, CY

Product information: Gildan 5000, 2 year warranty in EU and Northern Ireland as per Directive 1999/44/EC

Warnings, Hazard: For adults, Made in Nicaragua

Care instructions: Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F), Non-chlorine: bleach as needed, Tumble dry: low heat, Do not iron, Do not dryclean

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“Schmucks Gonna Schmuck” Tee

Designed for those who’ve stopped asking “Why?” and started muttering “Of course,” this unisex heavy cotton tee offers the deadpan comfort you’ll need to endure humanity’s ongoing parade of disappointment. The classic fit ensures it hangs just loosely enough to say, “I gave up, but I still got dressed.” Perfect for birthdays you didn’t want to attend, holidays you resent, and reunions that remind you why you left in the first place. Also makes a great gift for the one person in your life who still believes people can change. Ha.

Product Features

  • The Gildan 5000 is made with medium fabric (5.3 oz/yd² / 180 g/m²) consisting of 100% cotton, offering year-round comfort with lasting durability.  
  • The classic fit of this shirt ensures a comfy, relaxed wear while the crew neckline adds that neat, timeless look that can blend into any occasion, casual or semi-formal.  
  • The tear-away label means a scratch-free experience with no irritation or discomfort whatsoever.  
  • Made using 100% US cotton that is ethically grown and harvested.
  • Gildan is also a proud member of the US Cotton Trust Protocol ensuring ethical and sustainable means of production.  
  • This blank tee is certified by OEKO-TEX® STANDARD 100 (Certificate No. 168252, OETI - Institut fuer Oekologie).


EU representative: HONSON VENTURES LIMITED, gpsr@honsonventures.com, 3, Gnaftis House flat 102, Limassol, Mesa Geitonia, 4003, CY

Product information: Gildan 5000, 2 year warranty in EU and Northern Ireland as per Directive 1999/44/EC

Warnings, Hazard: For adults, Made in Nicaragua

Care instructions: Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F), Non-chlorine: bleach as needed, Tumble dry: low heat, Do not iron, Do not dryclean